


World Domination and Child Care, with a side of Teaching

by Ravenclaw_Peredhel



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Female Salazar Slytherin - Freeform, Harry Potter was Raised by Other(s), Male Rowena Ravenclaw, Sword of Gryffindor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-09
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:00:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24612670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravenclaw_Peredhel/pseuds/Ravenclaw_Peredhel
Summary: The Founders never died, but placed themselves in an enchanted sleep, so that they would only awaken when their true Heir appeared. Now, over a thousand years later, their time has come again...Disclaimer: I don't even know.  Anyway, I own the plot, and some of the kids. That's it I think.Constructive criticism welcome, same goes for my other stories :)
Relationships: Godric Gryffindor/Salazar Slytherin, Helga Hufflepuff/Rowena Ravenclaw
Comments: 15
Kudos: 63





	1. The long sleep

Salara Morrigan Slytherin was never what you could call impulsive. She had ideas, researched, planned and enacted said plans, then sat back and watched the mayhem that unfolded with glee if they were pranks, or satisfaction if they weren't. She was also a huge over achiever. At the age of 32, she and her husband Godric, as well as her sister Helga and brother-in-law Rowan, had created a hugely popular school of magic, filled it with teachers and books, and opened its gates to an ever increasing flow of students. This while raising two children, Rowena being 12 and Salazar 9, and with another on the way.

So, it was not an unusual sight to see her wandering the corridors of Hogwarts, a trail of books floating behind her, parchment spilling from her pockets and ink splattering her nose as she wrote frantically, muttering what sounded like nonsense at the time, but when you looked back after seeing the end result was either perfectly sensible or Parseltongue. Godric was sometimes heard to complain that she spent so much time teaching, with the children and in the library, not necessarily in that order, that she often forgot that she was married. Of course, she loved him dearly, but she was so often distracted. Her latest project was a bunker underneath the school to protect the children should the Mundanes ever attack and she had taken to carrying her Basilisk familiar around on her shoulders and it's progeny in her pocket, hissing distractedly at them while carrying out her other tasks. 

Right now, she was adding the final touches to the den where the child of her familiar would go, the final protection in case of attack. She flourished her wand as the final ward fell into place, shivering with delight at the task well done. Stumbling out into the main chamber, she smirked as she looked back at the statue guarding the entrance. It was a huge depiction of Merlin Emrys, her tutor as a young girl, the one who taught her how to be more than a spoiled princess. It wasn't particularly flattering, in fact it was actually quite rude, but he wouldn't mind, he would probably laugh. And Morgana, his daughter definetly would. She should probably show them. Yes, she would, just as soon as Harazar was settled. 

As she finally emerged from the chamber, she encountered her husband, looking slightly sheepish and black around the edges. "What on earth did you do now Godric? I can't deal with third degree burns any later than nine, or until I've had coffee, you know that. Your just lucky that I was up early finishing the chamber so I had coffee before the normal time." She said, exasperated. He might accuse her of being absent minded and obsessive, but at least she wasn't downright foolish. He had probably done something absolutely idiotic like fight a dragon or some other ridiculous thing. 

"Yeah, umm so there was this dragon, and it was asleep. And Rowan wanted to know what it's reaction time was, because it was a Vipertooth and he hadnt had a chance to study it yet..." Salara sighed, it was going to be a long day.

"Let me have another cup of coffee, I don't think I can handle it otherwise. But if Helga doesn't let me because of the baby and too much caffeine or whatever, I will leave you to suffer for the next two day's, because Helga will agree with me and no one else is a qualified Healer." Godric nodded sheepishly, hoping feverishly that Helga did not think two cups of coffee before half past six was too much for a pregnant Salara. 

Thankfully, Helga was reasonable and let Salara have another cup of coffee with a warning that this was a one off occurrence. Salara then treated Godric's burns, informing him that she expected lots of foot massages and child care out of him in return. Godric was so relieved to not be faced with a pregnant, coffee deprived, pre eight o'clock Salara that he would have agreed to almost anything and she knew it. Just as she began to tidy away the last of the burn salve, Rowena and Salazar tumbled into the staff common room, chattering excitedly about the prank that they had pulled on their cousin Helena Ravenclaw, not even waiting to check if their parent had heard the beginning of their explanation. "And then she yelled at me and said that she had a date with Aethelred in two hours and she couldn't go with purple and green spotted skin, and I said that if he left her because of that then he wasn't worth it. And them she hexed my fingers together and and I can't hold anything Mama, can you fix it please? " Salazar's outpouring ceased and Salara hesitated briefly, assimilating the information. 

"Finite incantatem." She said, pointing her finger at her hair brained son as she closed the cabinet. His fingers sprang apart and he giggled with glee, dancing over to the window and making rude gesture out of it before Salara hexed them together again. "Salazar Marvolo Slytherin, if you do not get some self control right this instant, I am confiscating your wand for the next two weeks." He pouted at her and flung himself on the couch where he leafed through a book on stasis charms once she took the hex off. "Honestly, what will happen when we are gone, I don't know. And your not helping Godric Gryffindor!" She added, rounding on her husband who rolled his eyes and kissed her. As he pulled away, she gasped and grabbed his arm. He smiled at her, although it was slightly tinged with worry, as the last time she had done that he had been press ganged into testing her wards for the Chamber. 

"What's wrong Salara?" He said, watching as her face lit up. Now Salara had a little bit of Seer blood from her mother, who had been a Trelawney. Not enough to give full on prophecies, but enough to have intuitions and gut feelings that were scarily accurate. However, sometimes it came full force and she knew specific things, sometimes about what enchantment was needed for the windows, sometimes about her great grandchildren's achievements. 

"We need to be there, hundreds of years from now. We need to be in stasis or something, I don't know. But the Heir of you and me... something will be wrong with him, he will need help and guidance. We will need to be in the Chamber, Harazar... Riddle... Godric, we need to be there,all four of us, or everything will collapse!" She said, getting really agitated, almost hysterical. He calmed her down gently, by now used to her abrupt mood changes and other vagrancies. Of course, being Godric Gryffindor, he was terrible with emotions and anything more complicated than fighting. But he knew exactly what she meant, them having grown up together, she as the princess of Mercia, he as the son of the king's best friend. So, he knew her off by heart, as she knew him, and he knew that they needed to obey the strange injunction that her Seer blood had granted her or the world would end.. probably...almost certainly. 

So, for the next hundred years, the Four Founders of Hogwarts raised their children and planned and researched and banged their heads on the table in frustration. But finally, one hundred years to the day that Salara had had her Foresighting, they were finally done. Four capsules lay in front of them, made of Alchemic Gold, far purer and more refined than anything else could be. The room that the capsules were in was the one that Salara had created all thos years ago, the one that Harazar was in. Harazar would be with them for all of the time that they were asleep, all five guarded by one of Harazar's children, Solem. "Now remember, the capsules will de age and heal us until we are perfectly healthy 21 year olds. The enchantments will allow us to wake up with all the knowledge that we will need, how to integrate with the Mundane and Magical worlds, any new spells and potions and other advancements, the location of wizarding centres and other crucial information. Wewill be awoken when our Heir sets foot in the Chamber for the first time, and we will be needed to defend him from a danger that I haven't been able to sssee." Salara's frustration at the limitations of her gift to See was so great that she began to hiss, annoyed at not being able to plan for every contingency. The Founders children and grandchildren were gathered around them, trusted with the knowledge of where and what their parents would be and do. Of course, the knowledge would eventually be lost, but hopefully, it would last long enough for them to still have power and influence. Merlin had died thirty years ago, and so Morgana was living with them. It had taken the six greatest minds of the Wizarding world to come up with this, and it was doubtful that anyone could ever do such a feat again. Over halfway through their second century, the Founders were now old, but still strong and clever. Being as powerful as they were, they would most likely not have died until well into their third century, but they were to sleep and heal until they needed the chance to save the child who was to save their world hundreds of years into the future. Their wands and other precious belongings were just able to fit into the capsules with them, small alcoves made for them so that time would not affect them. Harazar would come with them, Fawkes not being affected by time, and Helga's Puffskein and Rowan's Augery having died the year before, just before the final enchantments were ready. 

So, dressed in practical clothes that were sturdy enough to last whatever adventure would happen to them, hopefully, probably not with Godric and Rowan's penchant for trouble, they lay down in the capsules, Harazar joining Salara and the copies of their artefacts being given into their children's hands.

The last things that the Founders saw, was the faces of their children and grandchildren as the capsules closed, shutting out the light and air, and sending them into sleep, until they would be needed. And the last thing that Salara felt was a tear run down her face, as she committed her children's faces to memory. She would wake over a thousand years later, with the tear still on her face, and the pain of losing her children engraved in her heart.


	2. Yeah, a lot has changed

_July 1993_

**"Speak to me Slytherin, Greatest of the Hogwarts Four."** Riddle hissed at the giant statue. To his horror, Harry saw the mouth begin to move, revealing a hole behind it. He flung himself to the ground, covering his eyes. He heard movement inside the tunnel, before a voice was heard, as clear as a bell and full of laughter. "Uh actually, if one of us had to have that title, I would bestow it upon Helga. Not that I'm not flattered to be called Greatest of the Hogwarts Four but I'm pretty sure it's not true." Harry looked up, startled. The mouth of the statue was open, and in the aperture was a woman. He blinked several times. Then three other people came out, two men and a woman.

The first woman had long white blond hair that rippled in a silky sheet all the way down to mid calf, with piercing eyes the same green as Harry. She was tall and slender, with delicate, pointed features and full lips, so dark red they were almost purple against her creamy skin. She was wearing a dark green floor length dress, divided like a medieval lady's for riding with black leggings and black boots beneath. Around her neck was a beautiful locket, made of silver with an intricate arrangement of bright emeralds, the same shade as her eyes, which formed an S. 

She was holding the hand of an even taller man, with wild red hair and beard, and sparkling hazel eyes, so light as to be almost golden. The man held a sword, long and elegant, embedded with rubies. He was wearing a tunic and breeches, the exact shade of Gryffindor red, just like the woman was wearing Slytherin green. Harry stared at them, before noticing the other pair, a woman with bright sparkling black eyes and a river of honey blond hair. She was wearing a dress exactly like the first woman, but in yellow like Hufflepuff House rather than green. Fastened to her waist by means of a black ribbon was a small goblet, with two handles. This woman was next to a man who had wild black hair, even wilder than Harry's, as though he had run his hands through it repeatedly. His eyes were blue, almost purple and he was looking around interestedly, as though he had never seen his surroundings before. In his hand was a blue quill and a long scroll of parchment, on which he seemed to be noting things down. Hus clothes were blue, and he had a sword studded with sapphires by his side, but he was spattered with ink and didn't seem like a warrior

They levitated themselves down and the first woman sneezed. "I mean, I know that the Chamber isn't used much any more but you could at least dust it. It's not like you have to hew it out of rock or anything like I did, while teaching, building a school, figuring out how to end up in this time and raising three children. But no, apparently it's too much to ask for the tunnel to be dusted. Like seriously, once a century at least would he better than not for a thousand years, or what it seems like." At this point, Riddle seemed to regain his powers of speech and started shouting.

"Who are you? What are you doing in the Chamber of Salazar Sl-" But he got no further.

"Excuse me." The woman said affronted. "I am Salara Slytherin, Founder of Hogwarts, I have no need to explain to you why I am in my own Chamber." Harry''s jaw dropped and the woman glanced over at him. He halted, petrified at the piercing glance sent his way. Then she smiled. "You must be Harry. We've waited a long time to meet you." Then she turned and knelt next to the diary, her left hand over it which had a ring on the ring finger, shining bright silver and embedded with tiny flashing emeralds, even in the dim Chamber. In the middle of it was a large black stone, that had several scratches on it Riddle smirked at her.

"You can't harm my diary imposter. **I am the Heir of Salazar Slytherin and my word is law in this Chamber.** " The woman rolled her eyes, which seemed stupid to Harry as she didn't even have her wand in her hand. 

" **I don't even know where to start idiot.** " Harry and Riddle both gaped at the woman who hissed venomously back at Riddle. The blue eyed man grinned widely. 

"I'm so glad I thought to add the talent holders on the capsule's. Can you imagine if we had reverted back to our 21 year old abilities? No way to understand Parseltongue, we wouldnt know half of our spells...None of our weapons would have the enchantments on them. Although, I guess we could have used the..." The other three interrupted him, seemingly oblivious to the danger they were in. 

"Not now Rowan." Riddle was gaping at them, obviously not used to being ignored.

"No, no, no. What happened? **Speak to me Sl...** "

"Yes?" The woman answered, grinning at him. He snarled at her.

"What have you done? Why are you in Salazar Slytherin's chamber?" Harry thought that this might be a good time to warn the mysterious people of the danger. He didn't know who they were, but they didn't seem to like Riddle so he guessed they were alright.

"Look out. There's a Basilisk somewhere, it could attack at any minute. And be careful of him. He's Voldemort, he's really dangerous." The red headed man roared with laughter, slapping his thigh.

"Don't worry young Heir. Solem won't come for a while, he's catching up with Harazar. And this idiot? He's just a little boy playing bully. I doubt he even knows the full effects of making Horcruxes." And with those words, the man stepped next to the woman and stabbed the diary with his sword. Riddle shrieked, ink leaking out from the punctured pages like blood, and imploded. The woman sat back on her heels and tilted her head to the side like she was thinking. Then she swore violently. 

''Salara, language." The other woman scolded, black eyes dancing. 'Salara' rolled her eyes.

"I think it's justified Helga. The bugger made several other Horcruxes. One is what he thinks is my locket, what he thinks is your cup, Helena's diadem, which everyone thinks is Rowana, what he thinks is my wedding ring which is in this horrible clumsy gold setting without any of the silver or emeralds, just what they think is the Resurrection Stone, his pet snake and my young Heir. Call me overreacting but I think I'm justified." The others nodded, eyes wide and the other man swore. Salara rounded on him. "And you're not helping Godric. Your supposed to be the one who is good in situation like this. I'm good at politics not destroying Horcruxes." He snorted and motioned with a thumb to Harry, still lying on the floor, staring at them. 

********

Salara whirled as Godric motioned to their Heir, who was prostrate on the floor, his green eyes wide as he gazed unblinking about them. He looked uncannily like Rowena and she bit her lip to stifle a sob as the loss of her three children hit her like a wall. She walked over to him and knelt down. "Hello Theoharis. My name is Salara Slytherin, and I'm your many times ancestress through your mother. The man with the giant flashy sword over there is my husband Godric Gryffindor, the other lady my sister Helga Hufflepuff and the idiot with the scroll over there is my brother-in-law twice over Rowan Ravenclaw. We've waited a long time to meet you." Theoharis stared at her, not comprehending. Then she realised and face palmed. "Of course, your Squib aunt never told you your name. Too freakish for her. Everyone calls you Harry. Well, your parents named you Theoharis, which means God''s grace." He blinked and then sat up.

"W-w-who are you? If your husband a-and your sister are F-founders then where are Salazar Slytherin and Rowena Ravenclaw?" Salara blinked away tears as the reminder of her children sprang up, and Godric sprang to the fore, while Helga tidied and repaired the chamber and Rowan did who knows what. 

"Salazar was our son, and Rowena our daughter. For some reason, the headmasters of Hogwarts decided that correcting the false information about us was unneccesary. Tell you what, while the others clean up, I'll tell you the story. How does that sound?" Theoharis nodded and she conjured a sofa, sitting down on it and pulling him into her lap after casting a wandless cleaning charm on him. 

"My name is Salara Slytherin, and I was the eldest daughter of the king of Mercia. My best friend growing up was the son of my father's best friend, the court magician, Godric, who later became my husband. I had a younger sister named Helga, who married the court magician's other son Rowan. We were all Mages, and so my father employed Merlin Emrys to teach us. He brought his wife and daughter with him, Lady Nimue and our other best friend Morgana. The five of us grew up together, learning not only magic but politics, architecture, crafts and anything else Merlin saw fit to teach us. When I was 15, the king of Wessex offered to marry me. Wessex was a large and prosperous kingdom and an alliance through marriage with it would be very advantageous. However, he was cruel and greedy, having married three times already, and loathed magic. My father, knowing not only this but that Godric and I were already secretly promised to each other denied the proposition and sent the four of us with Merlin, Morgana and Nimue to hide in Scotland, where the king of Wessex could not find us. We found a castle near a lake and named it Hogwarts because we were drunk and the name stuck. We repaired it, turning it into a school and hiring House Elves and Professors. Unofrtunately, Nimue died two months after it opened and Merlin and Morgana left, not wanting to be there while her death was still so fresh. When I was 32, I had just finished the Chamber of Secrets, where we are now. That day, was one of the most momentous in our lives. I have some Seer blood from my mother's side, she was from the family Trelawney, and sometimes I can See things. That day, I Saw that we needed to be here now. So, for the next century, we worked to invent capsules of Alchemic Gold that de age us to 21, keep us alive, not erase our memories and wake us when you needed us as our Heir, and one day Lord Gryffindor-Slytherin. No, don't interrupt, I was getting to that. Your mother was our Heir, that is, mine and Godric's. But she never got an inheritance test done and so she never knew.

Anyway, Godric and I had three children, Rowena, Salazar and Guinevere. Salazar was Godric's Heir and Rowena was mine. The reason that everyone says that Salazar and Rowena were the Slytherin and Ravenclaw who were Founders and that Slytherin is evil etc. is all Salazar's fault. He slept with a girl named Katherine Umbridge who, when he sent her away after finding her cheating on him, began to spread lies, saying that he was the Founder, who was evil and dark and yadda yadda. I assume that eventually, it was taken as fact and then the story got more and more distorted. Any more questions?" She clapped her hands together, grinning at him, and he couldn't help but stare. This was almost too good to be true. He had family, albeit distant ancestors from the dawn of time, and her would be a Lord someday. Knowing that magic existed, her story was not dificult to believe. What was difficult was seeing the Founders in the flesh acting so ... human. Ravenclaw was scribbling on a long scroll of parchment, as Gryffindor examined the Diary, moving his wand in complicated motions that seemed a bit like those Madam Pomfrey's wand moved in when she was casting a diagnostic spell at him, talking to Ravenclaw as he did, who was nodding and writing things down, and Hufflepuff waved her wand repairing broken statues and pillars. The really hard thing to believe though, was Slytherin. She was sitting on the couch, holding him, Harry, no _Theoharis_ , which he liked a lot better, in her lap, like he was a small child. She was smiling at him, gentle and sweet, more like how he imagined Hufflpuff would be. He asked her why.

"If your Slytherin and your House values are ambition and cunning, than why are you acting like a Hufflepuff. Or why is Gryffindor, who is supposed to value bravery and chivalry, acting like a Ravenclaw. I'm confused." Salara smiled and replied.

"I value Ambition and Cunning and Resourcefulness the most because that is what I use the most. But because my sister and I were raised by the same family, are the same family, we have similar values. We actually tend to agree most on things, and our methods are much the same. Godric and Rowan are brothers and so have values instilled into them by their own parents. We are not one dimensional Theoharis, we merely sorted based on what kind of children we wanted to deal with the most, and what we valued the most. Personally, I think that Helga got the worst end of the PR stick. Everyone thinks that her house is the least scary and most easily trodden over. Trust me, you do not want to cross a Hufflepuff ever if you value your life and limbs intact."She shuddered dramatically and smiled, standing up and vanishing the couch as the last of the repairs finished. Theoharis was a curious child, beaten and bruised yes, but not broken, and very quick. He was in fact, very like a quieter version of her own son, and she suddenly struggled to breathe, as the realisation of the loss of her children crashed once more down upon her. 


	3. IMPORTANT PLEASE READ

Hello,

I''m not going to be able to update regularly until at least the summer holidays for 3 reasons

1 - I've recently begun GCSE level work

2 - I'm working for Grade 5 Piano

3 - MY dad is restricting my phone usage time

Apologies, I'll update as often as I can

Ravenclaw-Peredhel


	4. You What?

Harry felt bad, because every time that Lady Slytherin looked right at him, her eyes filled with tears. He wondered if it was his fault.

"Oh, no it isn't your fault Theoharis." He jumped as she answered. 

"H...how did you know what I was thinking?"

"I'm, well, we are all Legilimens. We can read minds," then, seeing his rather wary face, she added hastily, "only surface thoughts though. Once you reach a certain level of Legilimency, there is literally no way to turn it off. You can mute it, but the thoughts of everyone at once are like a hundred different melodies playing at once. It's why Legilimency is so rare." 

"But why are you so sad?" The question wasn't supposed to come out, and he clapped a hand over his mouth. Would she hit him now?

She made an odd swallowing noise, like she was choking back a sob. Looking around, her realised that the other Founders also seemed sad. "We...we went to sleep before our time. Our children....it is very recent for us still." The other Founders came over to them, Gryffindor putting his arm around her and Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw arguing about...something.

"Helga, Rowan. We need to see the present Headmaster." They all went towards the entrance, though Ginny was still unconscious, so was floating behind them.

"Uh, ma'am." How did you address a lady? "My friend Ron, his wand backfired and the entrance is all blocked." The Founders exchanged amused looks.

"Don't worry Theoharis." Hufflepuff's voice was kind. "That won't be a problem." Indeed as soon as they reached the wall of rocks, Ravenclaw flicked his wand and the tunnel was fixed. It was also a lot bluer. 

"You absolute prick Rowan!" Slytherin shrieked, although with a kind of teasing tone. She flicked her own wand and the blue was gone, replaced by a sort of silver sheen to the walls and ceiling, and soft green moss on the floor. 

"Forgive me, oh most fearsome Lady Slytherin." Ravenclaw muttered, rolling his eyes and Hufflepuff flicked his ear.

"Uh, Harry. Who are these people?" Ron was pointing his half wand at the four strangers warily.

"Hey Ron! Guess what, turns out my Mum was the Heir of Slytherin and Gryffindor, which is why I can talk to snakes, and Tom Riddle is Voldemort, come off it Ron, it's just a name. And these are the Founders, but Ravenclaw was a boy and Slytherin was a girl, and Slytherin is way nicer than she was supposed to be, and I don't ever have to go back to the Dursleys. Oh, and my name is actually Theoharis, and that is so much nicer so I'm keeping it." Everything that Harry learned poured out of him in one single unbroken stream at Ron who blinked and then shrugged, setting aside a lifetime of predjudice for his best friend.

"Okay then. Just checking, you are actually the Founders aren't you. Cos if you aren't and you are lying to Harry, I'll...I'll...set Hermione on you. "

"We wouldn't lie to Theoharis Mr Weasley, we Promise." The air shook as the four powerful witches and wizards sealed the Promise with their magic. Ron gulped. 

"Okay then. Pleased to meet you, my name's Ron Weasley." They each shook his hand.

"It is an honour to meet someone so loyal Mr Weasley. You would have done well in my house." Helga was the last to meet him.

"Oh hello. Is this where you four live then? I must say, it looks a lot nicer."

"And who is this?" Salara's voice was icy as Lockhart's eyes raked over her and her sister.

"Oh, that's our Defence teacher. He's a right git. He tried to Obliviate us using my wand, but it backfired and now he's lost all his memories." 

"I see." Godric growled, before conking him on the head with his sword hilt. "No one looks at my wife like that you Sƿīn ." Ron stared at his sword worshipfully. 

" **Stairs**." Salara's hiss and the subsquent grinding of stone made them all jump slightly. 

"Wicked." Ron breathed, as the pipe turned into an elegant flight of stairs with a silver rail.

"Yes, yes, Sal's a genius, can we move on." Rowan rolled his eyes and his sister-in-law 'accidentally' stamped on his foot. "Ow Salara! It was just a joke!" 

Their surroundings once they were up the stairs reminded Ron of something. "Why is the entrance to the Chamber in a girl's toilet?"

"So that everyone can get in of course. It wouldn't be a very good place to hide if it were completely isolated."

"Wait, what? Professor McGonagall said that it was the hiding place of a terrible monster that would purge the school of the unworthy." Harry (and Ron) were completely confused.

"It's a place to hide the students if the Muggles should ever find Hogwarts. And there isn't a monster down there, just Harazar. Honestly, people these days." Gryffindor sounded utterly bewildered that anyone could consider a giant Basilisk a monster, and Ravenclaw seemed to agree with him. Theoharis and Ron exchanged a glance. The Founders would get on well with Hagrid.

If it were a normal day, then everyone would probably be staring at the odd procession. First came Salara, flanked by Theoharis and Ron, then came Godric, followed by a bound and unconcious Lockhart who was rotating rather fast. Finally, Helga and Rowan followed, whispering as they catalogued the changes in their castle, Rowan carrying Ginny.

When they reached the Headmasters office though, Theoharis and Ron stopped them. "Wait! You need a password, and it's usually some kind of sweet." Salara giggled. Ron actually had to pause for a moment to forcibly realign his brain to compute it. The Slytherin Founder giggled. Giggled, like a teenage girl. The Slytherin! 

"Oh that's fine. We have an override password you see."

She cleared her throat, sending a mischievious glance at her fellow Founders. "Why the hell is it an eagle, it should be a raven. This is why you shouldn't get the smart ones." The gargoyle sprang aside and they all ascended. 

"Lord Ravenclaw." Ron whispered. "What does the password mean?"

"It was Helga's response to my mascot." Rowan replied with a straight face, unlike the rest of the founders who were laughing uproariously. Salara was about to knock when Godric grabbed her hand. He smirked viciously and then used Lockhart's head. She rolled her eyes and entered.

Inside Dumbledore's office, Lockhart was dropped in a heap behind the door. Molly grabbed and smothered Ron and Theoharis in hugs and thanks. This went on until Dumbledore cleared his throat, and everyone but the Founders went silent. In the quiet, their conversation went on for a while.

"No, I'm pretty sure that was there."

"No, it was under the window."

"Godric, Helga's being mean to me."

"Salara, you are more than capable of being meaner than anyone else in this room."

"You mean you don't love me?"

"What? Of course I do Lara darling."

"You just said I was mean"

"No, I..."

"I'm not talking to you."

'Whatever."

"I'll marry Harazar."

"Salara."

"Well?"

"I'm sorry."

"Good. I'm still not talking to you."

"Salara, come and talk to me, you haven't talked to me for years."

"That's because we locked ourselves up in gold boxes for several hundred years Helga. Honestly."

"Salara."

"What, I'm still not talking to you." Godric cleared his throat and motioned at the rest of the room. Instantly, Salara and Helga left off their playful bantering and quietened. Dumbledore looked quite annoyed. Probably because he had been ignored for the first time in a long time.

"Pardon me, but who are you charming young people?" His smile was rather forced, not that anyone could tell under his beard.

"Do you not know?" Godric's head tilted to the side, looking around the room. "Landica, you don't. Salara?" This was a tactical decision. Each of the Founders had something that they excelled at. For Godric it was battle and warfare, for Helga it was plants and things at home, for Rowan it was books and knowledge and for Salara it was charming and manipulating people.

"My name is-" But she was cut off by the door banging open. In stepped a man with long blond hair and cold grey eyes.

"So, you saw fit to return, even after the governers suspend you." He hissed, before noticing the four strangers. "And who are you?" He demanded, his lip curling.

"We were about to introduce ourselves wjen you interrupted us.'' Salara sniffed, her body language and tone every inch the highborn princess she was brought up as. "My name is Salara Slytherin," gasps, "this is my husband Godric Gryffindor," more gasps, "my sister Helga Hufflepuff," yet more gasps, "and hee husband Rowan Ravenclaw," another round of gasps, "we are what I believe is referred to now as the Founders Four?" A final roumd of gasps.

"Ah, yes. But pardon me, where are Salazar Slytherin and Rowena Ravenclaw?" There was Dumbledore, perpetuating the lie.

"They are our children. You must have mislaid your histories."

"Yes, yes, forgive me. An old man's memory can get a little muddled sometimes."

"Of course."

"Lady Slytherin." Lucius Malfoy interjected, his demeanour suddenly changed. "This is an honour indeed."

"Thank you, forgive me, I do not know your name."

"Malfoy, Lucius Malfoy my Lady."

"Lord Malfoy. Ah, we knew your ancestor I believe. Loxias Malfoi?"

"Yes, he tried to claim relation to us through Mum, Salara. It was the hair I think." Helga interjected, she, as the rest of the Founders, content to watch Salara do what she did best.

"Ah yes. So he did."

"But my lady, surely you would have been, at least distantly." Lucius Malfoy's voice was eager.

"And why is that?" Salara seemed honestly confused now. 

"Well, all Pureblood families are related."

"Yes, and what does that have to do with Loxias Malfoi and his claim Lord Malfoy?"

A terrible thought seemed to hit Lucius Malfoy. "You are Pureblood aren't you Lady Slytherin?"

Salara threw back her head and laughed. "Oh goodness no. No, I'm a, what is it called now? Oh yes, Muggleborn." He reeled back.

"But you were anti-muggle, and Mudblood, and the Chamber of Secrets." Oh, how much the Founders had missed seeing Salara rip someone apart with a few well-placed words.

"No, no I wasn't. My father's kingdom was Muggle. Why would I be anti-Muggle? And can someone please tell me why the Chamber is bad now?" Lucius Malfoy just walked out in a daze. A yelp and a thud followed, most likely owing to him falling down the stairs. Helga giggled.

"The Chamber of Secrets, Lady Slytherin, has the reputation of being the home of the legendary monster of Slytherin, placed their by the Slytherin Founder to purge the school of those with non-magical blood." McGonagall said, her voice showing in her every syllable just how much she believed it to be true.

"Yes, I got told that, which is ridiculous Row, that is going on the list by the way, but why the futuo is it bad? Who said so? It had to start somewhere! Oh, schitte. It was that Umbridge bikkja wasn't it? I told him, I told him that she was a bad idea. It went on the other list didn't it?"

Rowan thought for a moment. "Yes I think it was." 

"List? Umbridge? What is going on?" McGonagall seemed to have had enough. The Founders turned to each other and had a silent conversation using Legilimency before Salara answered. She had protested that this wasn't part of politics, but the argument hadn't stood and so she was still dealing with people.

"Okay, we will answer those three questions and no more, and then Theoharis is coming with us to have a nice long relaxing evening, capiche? Question 1- Row keeps lists of the most ridiculous things we find, stupid things people have done, times people have ignored my Sight and other things like that. Question Two-Katherine Umbridge, a right bikkja. She seduced my son when he was nineteen, and we couldn't kick her out without proof. Proof was found when we caught her sleeping with some random Muggle, we kicked her out of Hogwarts and Hogsmeade for life, in retaliation, she spread vicious rumours about my son and other things that he told her in confidentiality. Question 3- We are here to protect and raise our Heir. End of story, good night, we will see you in the Great Hall in the morning." And with that, the Founders swept out, taking Harry with them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sƿīn means pig in old english. Probably wrong dialect considering that they lived in scotland, but they were raised in Mercia so it should be fine right?
> 
> landica - actual swear-word in ancient rome, if you don't know what it means, maybe you shouldn't look it up.
> 
> schitte- old english (or middle english, not sure which) for shit
> 
> bikkja- old Norse for bitch
> 
> I just realised. I made the founders totally foul-mouthed didn't I. Oops. At least they are multi-lingually foul-mouthed. That's got to count for something right?
> 
> And yes, I know capiche is totally not going to be the right time period, but I couldn't resist.
> 
> Sorry for the long wait. Updates are going to be more infrequent now, as the parents have limited my phone time severely.  
> In the meantime, kudos and comments are appreciated.  
> And if you guys would consider looking at my othet stories, that would be awesome


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